First. XKCD being awesome. Roll over to read the little thingie.

Second. The highest temperature I saw today was 67. I live on the Tundra, folks. This is freakishly hot. The people I work with were all walking around with their coats on, buttoned or zipped. I, of course, had abandoned mine at about 10 A.M. Little birds were singing. Trees are budding. Students were wandering about in their bare feet. I couldn’t convince myself of that, but I intend to wear shoes that require no socks tomorrow. (One of my goals for the year is to get comfortable walking around with no shoes. I remember doing it the summer I was sixteen. Yes, chasing rainbows and lost youth.)

Third. My child almost killed me. For reasons I haven’t dared to ask, Daughter got out a book titled “Everything You Never Wanted Your Kids To Know About Sex (but were afraid they’d ask.)” I’m on the computer, she’s reading out loud from the book, everything is going good. She’s reading out some bit about The Deed, and how an eight-year-old isn’t going to understand the eroticism of it. I’ve just popped a grape into my mouth and taken a bite when she reads out something about, “It will sound to your child like “He put his nose into her mouth and blew snot into it.”

Have you ever tried to maneuver a grape out of the way while you were laughing so hard you couldn’t breathe? Really, it’s possible. Barely. “How did she die?” “Sex education.”